November 6, 2013
This is an e-mail to a friend I sent because she was mad at me for not contacting her. 🙂
(This is the part where you say “Don’t ‘hey you’ me!” and I get scared and hide behind my teddy bear)
You have every right to be mad at me; I know that, so I’m sorry. But don’t think that it means I’m not going to give you a bunch of excuses that probably won’t even justify my lack of contact with you.
Without further ado, here is a list of excuses:
- I have been busy (ding ding ding, didn’t expect that one did you now *sarcastic voice*)
- I was very stressed out for so long, and still am. (This is the part you say “And you think I wasn’t? But look at me, I still tried to contact you)
- I have no idea what to do with my life. (I mean, I really don’t know what to major in, and that is NOT good)
- I am just a lazy person. (Surprise, surprise…well no surprise there really)
- Your lack of Facebook ~or any social media sight to be honest~ (GET ONE WOMEN!)
- I’m a bad friend (This is when you hug me and say “No you’re not” [But in all honesty, you would probably say “yes, yes you are” and wack me on the head with a textbook])
- I’m out of excuses (Fine, you can scream at me now)
Now, before you start going off on me, let me tell you this: I have a 5 page research paper due tomorrow, which I re-stared on because I hated my topic. And instead of working on it I’m writing you this very long e-mail with my apology, so you should cut me some slack (But please don’t cut it all, then I might fall…I think that’s how it works in rock climbing…or something like that…)
And now…drum roll please! *BADADADADADADADA!* my long apology!
There once lived a beautiful princes in the land of… ummm U of I villa…? well anyway it doesn’t matter what it was called, my point is, there was a beautiful princess. And this beautiful princess was like no other, she was just stunning, her name was Saloni.
Saloni ruled the land of U of I villa and everyone adored her, but mostly her greatest friend Shati. However, Shati might not have been the “greatest friend” because Shati was a lazy bum that was just too lazy to do anything.
So when one day the beautiful princess Saloni was kidnaped by the evil dragon…bob…yeah, let’s call him bob… everyone tried to save her, everyone but Shati.
*GASP!* Why? You ask? She was lazy, and she made up stupid excuses to get her off the hook (which you can find the list of seven excuses I typed before up there ^).
Well, after about a good five month or so, Shati decided to get off of her lazy but and drag it over to the castle where Saloni was held. She walked in and knocked on the door. The dragon opened the door; he was dressed in a black suit and red bow tie. Shati was about to speak when Saloni popped up from behind the dragon. Her glair burnt a hole through Shati.
Need I say she was upset? Well, she was upset, and not just upset, but FURIOUS! She wacked Shati with a textbook and screamed at her for what seemed to be years, but in the end they sat down, talked, and made up.
Don’t get me wrong, she was still mad at Shati, but she decided to forgive her lazy friend in the hopes that Shati would be less lazy.
Wouldn’t it be great if you could forgive me like that and we lived happily ever after? I won’t blame you if you don’t, but yeah, I’m sorry, really really really sorry!
Well, I should go now. I will try to call you as soon as I can (which will be most likely tomorrow, since I’m stuck in the Library working on my paper)
Bye! Hope to talk to you soon!
I Love you!
-Your Go-Can: Shatiboo